[Kokanaden] Otaku Helpline revived – A personal issue

I realized that I have been so busy that the Otaku Helpline initiated by me has been left abandoned for quite a few months. Let me revive it with a personal issue of mine.

I was out having a very late night/early morning chat/catch-up with two of my friends at MacDonalds in Terminal 3, I believe it was about 5a.m., when I saw this rather attractive girl, despite her rather heavy make-up walk briskly into the joint. I can’t really remember what she was wearing, but she was wearing this rather low-cut black skirt, so low-cut that i remarked to my friend that without any effort, I could literally upskirt her.

In any case, I continued talking to my friends while observing her. She seemed troubled, and I was proved right, since she was waiting for friends to arrive, and looked rather flustered, in addition to tearing halfway.  Being the normal softie I am (I can’t bear to see girls crying, especially rather attractive ones), I had this sudden urge to get up, grab a few serviettes and pass it to her. Then I decided against it, since I didn’t know how to pass the serviettes to her.

On hindsight, on my way home, I was sort of thinking, maybe I could just walk up and offer her the serviettes, and then just walk back. Then again, being the normal spineless/hopeless guy I am, I was afraid of being knocked back by a caustic comment. Which is basically what my fear has been all this while, actually. Fear of rejection.

I don’t know why I’m actually posting this on RIUVA, but I guess perhaps there might be a slim chance that the girl (or her friends) reads this blog, so I could get a second shot at being acquainted with her. And no, the short skirt was just a bonus. Honest. Any advice anyone?

In any case, just now was the first time I’ve thought of getting acquainted with a girl in a long while. Been too busy recently with club stuff, or with earning money.

20 Responses to “[Kokanaden] Otaku Helpline revived – A personal issue”

  • Being the extreme cynic and pessimist that I am, I would have been wary that perhaps there might have been some trap (not the Anime kind). But I might have simply asked her from a distance if she was alright and if she needed help, and then offer her the serviettes.

    Rejection is scary indeed. But if you build into your expectations that there is a high probability that you would be rejected, then if you are indeed rejected, it shouldn’t be too terrible. Like when investors already expect the Central Bank to raise interest rates to a certain level- the eventual raising by the Central Bank won’t have much of an effect.

  • “Maybe the girl doesn’t have that deep a problem that she needs some pampering coming from a total stranger.”

    That’s me talking pessimistic and denying the feeling of rejection. If I were in that same situation, I would think this way and ignore her, and there goes my chance flying away again.

  • WTF is a “low-cut black skirt,”? Anyway be wary of girls who dress sexily, they do not have good intentions. Nice girls only dress sexily when their man tells them to.

  • Hmmmm….let me take this occasion to dispense my mac daddy wisdom. First of all, rejection is a part of life and overcoming it as soon as possible is best or you’re doomed to a life of regret and perpetual “what if’s”. Secondly, girls do not like insecure men; therefore, even the slightest hint of insecurity will doom your chances of winning any affinity with said girl. Thirdly, do not approach a girl with an “I want you” mentality, rather it should be with an “I want to inquire of you” mentality… girls can easily distinguish between the two and are usually put off by the former, unless they gave the signal of wanting you first, and even then it isn’t necessarily safe to immediately reciprocate such intentions. And lastly, girls, hot or otherwise, are just human and interacting with them is no big deal. Here’s some homework for you, once a week walk up to a random hot girl and just strike up a conversation. You can talk about anything of interest to her, and I put emphasis on “of interest to her!!”, keep your interest to yourself because the only person interested in what your interested in, is you. Enough of these excursions should properly inoculate you towards any fear of the opposite sex. Cheers

    I am G-man!

  • With all the advice you are getting, you just need to come across a damsel in distress.

  • macnona serviettes are not good for tears

    and how can a skirt be low cut?

  • Be confident. Be funny. You win the girl. You marry. Game over.

  • Ok sorry mini-skirt then.

    In any case, I really just wanted to give the girl some tissues. Girls should never be allowed to cry in public. Then again, it’s very hard to talk about intentions; I mean, she was hot, and given a chance I’d definitely want to keep in touch.

    So pure intentions are always bullshit.

  • You mention twice that she is attractive; once in the parentheses that you can’t bear to see her cry especially because she is attractive. If your motivation to help her was for a great part because 1) she is a girl, 2) she is attractive, I think leaving her alone was the right thing to do.

  • @madeener I don’t get your point. Doesn’t make sense at all. A similar situation would be this girl spilling coffee all over her at a restaurant. So your point is, if my motivation to help her for a great part was due to 1) her being a girl, 2) her being attractive, I shouldn’t approach her at all?

    Granted, I shouldn’t use the serviette-getting act as a pretext to getting to know her, but then again, it really isn’t wrong to get to know her through the serviette-getting act.

  • I think he means that helping with those ulterior (?) motives defeats the whole point of helping out a person just because they seem to need it, and that a possible conclusion would be that you would only help people who looked in need if they could offer you something in return, such as the acquaintance of the girl. It’d have been better to have just helped her disregarding her looks if you truly wanted to help. At least, that’s what I think madeener is saying… personally, I don’t really want to comment on such issues because I can’t be sure I haven’t been guilty of the same act. Meh.

  • Yes, as Yukarin says. My apologies for the ambiguity. Furthermore, you may put yourself in her shoes; if on the verge of tears and under distress, I doubt you’d want a stranger coming up to you and offering you a serviette either. Not only would you begin to think “what does this guy want?” or “WTF?” but all the more you’d be getting ready to go into rage mode under all that stress, which is why I think leaving her alone was the best course of action.

  • Alright. As a female, I will say that if I were her, although I probably would’ve reacted in an irritated fashion to you, I probably would’ve actually appreciated it. I wouldn’t want the fact that I was crying directly referenced, though, maybe just while passing it to her say, “Would you like one?” would be the best route.

    Although, to reference some earlier comments, if she looked really really REALLY pissed, it was probably best not to approach her. If she just looked more upset than angry, I’d say it might be safe. It’s just nice to know that someone cares when you feel upset and a bit alone, even if you don’t know them… and it doesn’t sound like you’re the type to come off as a creep just fishing for a girl.

  • Moral of story: Carry ropes and candles with you at all times.

  • No 1: airport floor tiles are highly reflective…

    besides that… we’ll u shld approach her with the “i’m a stranger and progressing to be an acquaintance” mentality and not the “i’m a stranger, i think ur loose, ur sad and i wanna screw u to make u happy” mentality… coz that’s wad i feel from what u said

    Either way, start by saying “sorrie miss, are u ok” would be a safe option… if she responds by “i’m okay” it means she doesn’t want to continue on the conversation and probably very angry at ur intrusion… if she responds by “i’m okay, thanx” it means she’s prolly very upset but not angry and in fact cld use a consoling buddy she can talk to… this is prolly when u offer the tissue/serviettes/tshirt… if she takes it try to small chat wif her and she’ll prolly respond… if she doesn’t take it it’s signal that she doesn’t talk to strangers and it’s time for u to take ur leave

    but if she doesn’t respond to u, it’s best u juz shrug ur shoulders and leave… coz anymore actions like giving her serviettes wld prolly produce a scream of “I DUN NEED UR CONCERN” loud enough that the ppl queuing up at the other end of the airport can hear her…

    either way, dun look lecherous and look sincere… girls can tell when ur sincerely concerned and when ur trying to juz pick em up…

    moral of the story… take up the courage and go up to her and ask if she’s ok… it’s a start (:

  • @A Day Without Me Actually, I don’t really understand, if you really appreciate it, why not show it plainly with a thank you? Weird logic girls have sometimes. But thanks, sound advice, after all, you’re a girl. Haha.

    @Sasaki Sorry, not into that kind of stuff.

    @Victor When do I ever look lecherous. I am just observant. Sincere, observant and appreciative of pretty girls.

  • First off, let me say that I’m kinda in the same boat as you kokanaden. So, this advice I’m about to give may mean less when I say that. Anyway, I think that you should look at it from two points. One: If you don’t take the initiative, you gain nothing and you lose nothing, though you may end up regretting it. Two: If you do take the initiative, you open up more possibilities, or ‘another route’. Now, of course, you may end up embarrassing yourself or you may face rejection, but would you rather end up regretting not taking the effort to talk to the girl? And even if you do embarrass yourself or get rejected, just get up again. It’s better than regretting not taking that opportunity to talk to her. I know that my advice might not help, but hell, I offered it in hopes of giving you some type of motivation for future encounters.

  • It’s not being brave/spineless–to get gurls you really need to throw away your pride and act like an idiot. The more shameful you look, the better attraction you get, and the better image.

  • Mmm…

    most of things have already been mentioned,
    However a simple asking if she’s ok with serviettes generally is alright, the rest is up to her response.

    However, serviettes aren’t the best way to wipe tears, carrying tissues on you is more handy.

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