Coyote Ragtime Show is so Wrong! But See the Proper Version Here!

This show pretty much turned out to be gutter fodder. But the first episode was so promising, with great action, slaughter, comedy, sexy babes, cool thieves, battle royale and dune worms! How did it all go so terribly wrong?

  • The intricate planning of Mister’s gang to bust him out was never replicated. For the rest of the show it was all "It’ll all be alright! Don’t worry!" and other irresponsibly retarded lines instead of actual hard planning. Oh, nuclear bomb? We’ll just drive faster and get the treasure before it explodes then. If not, too bad.
  • Stupid scenes where rows of guns are shooting at either the Coyote or the Coyotes themselves but nobody gets hit. The bullets all whiz by like a old Scooby Doo cartoon. Even those fired by the super skilled 12 Sisters.
  • Mister talks about how Coyotes never abandon their family. The next scene has them leaving Katana to fight the sisters and their underlings alone while Mister and Franca head off for treasure. If not for number 2, Katana would’ve had eaten a billion bullets and grenades.
  • Angelica was in love with Mister. Oooh why? Because he looked cool on a surf board despite his rather geriatic appearance.
  • So what’s the point of Chelsea? She was of less significance to the story than even… me. At least I watched everything.
  • Swamp and Bishop behave like juveniles instead of the veteran slick thieves they profess to be. When sneaking aboard another ship and pretending to be a deliveryman, Bishop stammers and fluffs his lines like Tsuyokiss’s Sunao! And to think he was supposed to be a master of disguise from the first episode!
  • Marciano’s backstory was never revealed. They just glossed it over by showing her to be a cyborg and pissed off at Coyotes because they have freedom. Wtf?
  • May and Angelica get all chummy suddenly. It was like one episode they were ignoring each other and the next, all smiles and chatting.
  • The supposedly l33t 12 sisters missed everything except grunts. And they never fought much again after the first and second episodes.
  • The thousands of missiles fired never hit anything. Oh and Swamp and Bishop got hit straight on by about 200 of them but just had a little bit of carbon and messed up hair. And Sep dies from a couple of puny ones. So much for androids being stronger.
  • Sandworms don’t ever appear again. Cheating scum.

There’s probably a lot more but I finished watching this a week or so ago.

Ufotable sucks. With such a brilliant 12 Goth Loli concept, they fuck it up with this shit. The following shall show how Coyote Ragtime Show should’ve been done.

Title: Coyote Ragtime Show The 12 Sisters
Genre: Scifi Action Stupidity Sci-fi Slice of Life Comedy Drama

  • The show focuses on the every day lives and missions of the Marciano’s 12 Sisters. While episodic, with a new mission every week, there is an overarching story involving the capture and torture of Mister and his merry men.
  • The main character is April, with May and Marciano also important characters. Mister is the antagonist, albeit the "good guy".
  • Several plotlines flow through the story, which will show the 12 sisters doing not only their missions with precision and deadliness, but also their everyday lives and social interactions.
  • April is embroiled in a love triangle with May and Marciano. April loves Marciano but the latter treats her as a daughter. May loves April but the latter treats her as an important comrade.
  • September taking care of the triplets as they go through the journey of life. With September’s death, June takes over as the surrogate mother and comes to terms with having to take care of the three young girls, on top of having to juggle her own work commitments.
  • August is the comic relief, providing us with laughs through her slapstick antics. Like the spamming of grenades.
  • January’s best friends with Sep but is destroyed by her death. She leaves on a journey of revenge and becomes a renegade sister.
  • March, being selfish and vain, pisses off everyone but the kind and patient Feb. March learns how to share and think about others, after experiencing a major ordeal alone.
  • Between drama and comedy, there are tonnes of well-planned and tactical action scenes involving the sisters doing what they do best. One episode is Enemy at the Gates-style, with Sep facing off with an enemy sniper.
  • Not forgetting the fanservice, bath scenes would be nice. March asks the doctor to give her bigger tits like July.
  • There’s also political powerplay, with Marciano battling the war of words both inside the Crime Guild and against the government.
  • And the final episode has Mister being hung, drawn and quartered while Franca watches in tears.


25 Responses to “Coyote Ragtime Show is so Wrong! But See the Proper Version Here!”

  • Lol nice deduction and some good sister pics, though some of them….quite unnecessary

  • Fuck you. You didn’t put a NSFW tag. I’m viewing this now in class and I had to scroll all the way down no thanks to the pantsu.

  • These are perfectly safe for work. No nudity.

  • I quite agree. Coyote Ragtime Show’s first episode must be the greatest case of false advertising I have seen in anime for some time. I had such high hopes for a new age Lupin III with Angelica replacing the hapless and ultimately frustrated Zenigata and Mister taking the role of noble felon. The Twelve Sisters looked to be fitting protagonists. After introducing all of them, they could appear in smaller groups in subsequent episodes that let them shine. Mister would outwit them despite their superior capabilities in their fields.

    Instead I got some juvenile buddy story. Bleah. None of the Coyote’s crew come across as skilled professionals at all, Mister’s greatest assests seem to be luck and an obliviousness towards anything approaching rational thought. How would he face Bruce in the afterlife if Franca had bought it when Graceland went bye-bye because they were three seconds too late?

    Marciano was obviously meant to be some sort of tragic villain. However its a lot like trying to win sympathy from the audience by skipping past all the unimportant bits (like say, the plot) and expecting us to be won over by crazed rantings. Now if she were a former police inspector thrown off the force because of Bruce’s antics and her failure to contain him, then maybe it would have been a matter of sweet irony. Or it might be a case of police brutality that got her kick out of her job because Bruce got the better of her one too often….

    The most hard done character I feel is Angelica. Its been a long time since a female character was meant to impress us with her intelligence in an anime. There are plenty of femme fatales like Cowboy Bebop’s Faye Valentine (one of the archetypal characters of this breed really), Gun X Sword’s Carmen 99 or most recently Black Lagoon’s Revy. Chelsea is essentially Tenchi Muyo’s Mihoshi sans the ability to cause mass destruction. Angelica however fits the role of a strong, intelligent woman. The last one I can remember of the breed is Bubblegum Crisis 2032′s Sylia Stingray; the 2040 version inexplicably is rather unstable compared to the source character.

    What did she get? The greatest cliche of all time, the woman chasing after the man by repressing her insatiable, er, attraction for him. Just reminds me that for every “Nin-Nin ga Shinobuden”, ufotable makes a “Futakoi”.

  • Very well said, couldn’t have written it better myself.

    Your first para aptly sums up what we all thought Coyote would be like. I hate ufotable.

    As for strong intelligent females, surely there are a lot of them. I never did like Angelica, she just didn’t have that class (I attribute it to her binge eating). Off the top of my head, I can think of better ones – Anna of Shaman King Manga, Sephilia of Black Cat manga. Oh these are manga.

    Anime would be like, Itoko of School Rumble being a recent one.

  • Osakabe Itoko is indeed a very good character but for some reason she gets vanishingly little screen-time. Quite a pity that and her manga incarnation does not fare all that well either. Something like having a young and fit Pele in your squad but always using him as a last-ten-minute substitute. Part of me wishes that Kobayashi Jin would do a spin-off based on the teachers, Osakabe Itoko, Sasakara Yoko and Anegasaki Tae. Heck even Tani-sensei can be comic relief. ^_^

    As you noted though, there seems to be this strange effect that when translated from manga to anime, quite a few female characters seem to undergo a lobotomy.

  • Itoko is a wilder and more sexy version of Akira, so that probably explains the lack of screen time. The thing about such characters is that they cannot be used too much, if not their air of mystery which makes them sexy and intelligent would be lost.

  • Viewing girls with their legs spread open and their pantsu revealing isn’t as safe as nudity. >.>

  • You’re so freakin’ right.

  • tj_han: Panty shots aren’t safe for all workplaces–including mine. I had to scroll fast, lest someone walk by. It’s a major reason I’m about to go through splitting Houblog’s anime to a new blog. I’ll also have to not drop by here while at work. Sorry, not to be harsh, but that’s life in the office.

    But yeah, I’m only up to episode 9 or 10, and I tend to agree, it went braindead after the first episode. And I haven’t seen any August grenade mayhem in a while.

  • i just feel that they rushed the entire series and i was dissapointed with the lack of exciting mind games as teh show progressed


  • We all got conned.

    Never trust a studio that makes shows like futakoi alternative.

  • Gah, gaaaah. If you remember I posted an insanely long comment blathering about how awesome Coyote would be when it first aired – only to get served a directionless crapfest. The sadder part is I’ve only laboured up to ep 08 and will make myself sit through the last few eps for completion’s sake. Most misleading looked-awesome series EVER.

    p.s. That last pic of March is better than the entire series combined. Sigh.

  • Blah, Futakoi Alternative was actually good. Unlike this one.

    Just wanted to add random comment that isn’t related to anything…

  • I second your opinion.

    How can something so awesome turn so awful. ufotable must be high on smth to botch this =.=.

  • OMG!!!

    From Anime News Service:

    Information published in the November issue of Comic Rush hints at a possible sequel to the Coyote Ragtime anime TV series. The name of the project is “Twelve Sisters Story”, centering on Madame Marciano’s Twelve Sisters from the original. The format could be an OVA but at this point there seems to be some question on whether to produce the project. Something that may push the development is a coming American fan / consumer base garnered through ADV Films’ license announcement at AWA this past weekend.

  • Yes, I read that too – either it’s a fake or they read this entry. *harr harr*

  • So basically you want Gunslinger Girl except half the girls are post-pubescent and half aren’t. Hmm… I want that too.

  • AprilRocksMySocks

    I agree completely

    Mister needs to die

    This is the greatest anime related reading I have ever read in the last….year, perhaps ever. Yes I would say ever.

    Oh just in case people forgot

    Mister needs to die

  • wow thats awesome!! wish i could find more pics of that.

  • … this is so friggin wrong!!

  • Man that is what I’m talkin bout.
    Nice one kid. Its all good baby!

    The 12 sisters need a series for themselves.

    26 eps of it would be nice.

  • Wow! So sorry it wasn’t a pedo buffet like most you pervs wanted. Jeez man. I suppose you people think Cowboy Beebop is crap also? And I don’t know what version you watched but I know for a fact people got shot because I’m watching it on dvd right now.

    P.S. Mister fucking rocks!

  • there actually is some nudity look at the grenade spammer girl

Comments are currently closed.